"From Jesus Christ, the faithful witness, the first-born of the dead, and the ruler of the kings of the earth. To Him who loves us and released us from our sins by His blood"  (Rev. 1:5)

From Drugs to Freedom (England)

By Margaret Ozsen

I was born and grew up in Scotland. I am 44 years old. I came from a very poor background and as I was growing up my parents were also very violent towards us as children. One time I was beaten with a belt so hard by my mother that I couldn't go to school because of the marks. At school I and my brothers & sisters were bullied because we came from such a poor family and because our parents neglected us at times. I left home at the age of 17 to get married. By the age of 18 I was going through a divorce and I had a daughter that had cerebral palsy. As a result of all of this I became very reclusive for about three years, I felt so shy and insecure and I found it so difficult to relate to people.

Then I met Jim, a guy I liked, and we started to have a relationship. He used to go out a lot and to hang around with a bad crowd. I liked him but not the people that he associated with. I started to go out with him when he would go out and unbeknown to me he would spike my drink with drugs. After 3 weeks of doing this he told me, but I wasn't angry with him though, in a way I felt glad because it made me feel good & not so shy & reclusive. Fairly quickly I moved from the spiked drinks to smoking the drugs to snorting them to injecting. I felt that I couldn't function without it and so I would inject a few times daily. Jim by this time had become so violent, but I was dependant on him for money for drugs and my family had disowned me so I had to stay with him. He also had such a strong psychological hold over me. I felt that I couldn't cope with caring for my daughter and so I gave her up for adoption at this point.

My sister came over from Ireland & came to visit me. She was a Christian and she invited me to go to church with her, I went just to spite Jim because he didn't want me to go. I went but I didn't understand what was going on. I was desperate to get away and at this time I met a man who was very kind to me, he was from London and he said that I could come and stay with him. So I ran away from Jim and I hitch-hiked to London to stay with this man, Can (pronounced Jaan) who was more or less a complete stranger. Jim though had such a strong psychological hold over me though that I felt I couldn't cope without him and so I phoned him and asked him to come to London. He did and we lived together again in West Hampsted. He promised to stop being violent towards me, but old habits die hard, and we soon resumed our old ways of being - me taking drugs and he beating me. 5 o'clock one morning I could take no more and so I caught a taxi to Can's house. When Can saw me he started to cry saying "What have they done to you?" This amazed me as I had never known gentleness.

From then on I stopped injecting the drugs, although I was still smoking them. Everyday was so hard though, I felt as though I was living in a play, I couldn't function properly due to all the painful memories. I couldn't be alone for more than an hour at a time and I would constantly weep. One time I remember weeping and weeping thinking that I didn't know how I was going to get through. In the midst of that utter torment I heard an audible voice saying "Trust me." I didn't know whos voice it was at that point but I felt a sense of peace.

A while later I got a call from my sister in Ireland (who is a pastor) to say that she was in London and she wanted to come and visit me. When she saw me she couldn't believe the change in me, I had stopped injecting the drugs and I had put weight on and was cleaner! She was amazed because she had been praying for me for so long. She offered to pray for me while she was with me and I accepted because she was my sister. Nothing spectacular happened at that point and afterwards I went and made a cup of tea! From there she invited me to visit her in Ireland. I went and during that time I started to open up to her about all that had happened, she listened and talked to me about Jesus. I was crying and crying and she motioned to me to come over to her, I did and she started to cuddle me, all of a sudden it wasn't her who was holding me, it was Jesus and my head was on his shoulder. I was crying, saying "They're hurting me". He pointed into the darkness where there was a sense of evil and he said "You don't come near her anymore, she's my child now, my hand is on her & I bless her." Then it went back to my sister holding me. From then on I knew that Jesus was real and alive. My sister explained about prayer & deliverence and so the next day I went with her and someone she knew prayed for me in Jesus name and I experienced some deliverence.

I returned to London and had been given the name and address of a church that I was told would help me. I attended that church and over a period of three years I had lots of prayer and deliverance. I could see God setting me free. Through taking drugs I damaged my body and so I not only needed spiritual healing but also physical healing. I had contracted Hepatitis C. One day I had an appointment with the hospital but I didn't want to go because I fed up with them poking and prodding me around. My GP persuaded me to go though. I arrived and the doctors took me in and they said that they had some good news for me, they said that they could find no trace of Hep C in my body. They had done test after test and yet they couldn't find anything. I asked for this to be put in writing because I wanted to show all the people that had been praying for healing for me.

Now I feel so much more energetic. I started attending Eleos Christian Church where I work in the church office 3 days a week, answering phones, etc. I have no formal education but they are helping me. I am beginning to get my life back. I attend Bible School at Eleos and I am living very happily in my own home with my two cats.

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